Here i will share my journey of hopefully one day recognising my dream of becoming published writing what i love to read; Romance!

Monday, March 14, 2011

Broken Heart blogfest

My first blogfest, and amidst reading for my diploma if thought this would break up the pace nicely!
So here is my entry with a scene of less than 1,000 words:

"the basic idea is to write about a heart breaking or one that is already broken. Show us the wretched emotions, the anger, depression, fear, whatever happens after the happy honeymooon lovey-dove V-day stuff is over and all that is left is a broken heart."

He'd used her. To gain access to power, he'd actually done as she'd asked, changed her world, her whole perspective on sex, love, everything. And he'd had another agenda all along.
The pain in her chest was crushing and she bent over clutching her heart, gasping for air.
How could she have been so stupid? She'd let down her guard, let him in and he wasn't what she'd thought.
But it had all seemed so real. The looks, the touches, the words. But that's all they'd been. Shallow reflections of what she'd always been looking for, wondering, and had thought she'd found.
But her first theory had been right. Fairytales were for books, not real life.
It crushed her, devastating her with the sharpness of his betrayal. With the discovery of the world's biggest lie.
How could he do this to her? He'd said he cared for her. Every look, touch, every time he'd spoken to her his eyes had been filled with... oh she was a fool. She'd probably imagined the soft affection in his eyes. He'd taught her that sex could be fantastic, mind-blowing. But for him it had been a means to power. And for her? For her it had been everything. She'd given him her heart and he'd taken it, enmeshed it in his lies and now she was broken.

Well, when i'd started this i'd hoped it would be something separate from any of my three WIPs. Turns out my Princess story just won't be banished, even for a blogfest!
Hope you've enjoyed my snippet!

Have fun with yours if you have joined!!


  1. Nice to see her debating this agony she feels. very well done, and a fun read.

  2. thanks guys, the next scene is where she confronts him. She's done wallowing :D

  3. Kerrin, I love the way you've written this, the angst, the indecision, the looming confrontation. Great entry.


    Broken Hearts Blogfest Entry

  4. I can really feel the tension with what's to come. I held my breath through the whole reading, great job!

  5. This was really sad...but very intense. I feel so bad for her, poor girl :( That guy makes me mad... he needs to suffer and see what it feels like to be heartbroken like that. Urgh, unfortunately many victims in relationships are used like that even in real life. :(


  6. Gahhh, poor lady - I know how it is ;) Well, not about the lies so much, but about the heartbreak for sure!

    Great writing!

    To answer your question on my post, her boyfriend died.

  7. Short, but gets right to the heart of the MC, I feel her betrayal.

  8. LOL I love that the princess story won't be banished!

  9. Hi,

    Good to see you're letting your hair down with a blogfest. Fun, ain't they?

    Nice piece you've written: punchy, angsty, and so building up for a revenge hit! ;)


  10. Just go to show you shouldn't change for the sake of someone else... ; )

  11. Nicely done. The short story displays the broken heart theme well. How some people can be so fake or change and how the lure of power can corrupt someone to do such actions. Thanks for entering my blogfest.