Here i will share my journey of hopefully one day recognising my dream of becoming published writing what i love to read; Romance!

Friday, June 24, 2011

Friday Writer



This week's theme is Love Hurts! Click on the image to go to the Romantic Friday Writer site for details!

This week your MCs have a dilemma to solve. Maybe both MCs are facing a crisis point in their relationship, and one or the other decides to resolve the problem in the only way they know how. Perhaps an MC has chosen to confide in a third party, their advice invaluable. Or, a misread/misdirected text/email has caused angst, heartache and bitterness, where a simple explanation can heal a fast-breaking heart. 

From my Princess story. I wrote this for a blog post a while ago - sorry, i haven't had a chance to write something new!:

He'd used her. To gain access to power he'd actually done as she'd asked, changed her world, her whole perspective on sex, love, everything. And he'd had another agenda all along.
The pain in her chest was crushing and she bent over clutching her heart, gasping for air.
How could she have been so stupid? She'd let down her guard, let him in and he wasn't what she'd thought.
But it had all seemed so real. The looks, the touches, the words. But that's all they'd been. Shallow reflections of what she'd always been looking for, wondering, had thought she'd found.
But her first theory had been right. Fairytales were for books, not real life.
It crushed her, devastating her with the sharpness of his betrayal. With the discovery of the world's biggest lie.
How could he do this to her? He'd said he cared for her. Every look, touch, every time he'd spoken to her his eyes had been filled with... oh, she was a fool. She'd probably imagined the soft affection in his eyes.
He'd taught her that sex could be fantastic, mind-blowing. But for him it had been a means to power.
And for her? For her it had been everything. She'd given him her heart and he'd taken it, enmeshed it in his lies and now she was broken.
With a deep breath Tori steeled herself. Like hell she was going to take it lying down. She was through being treated like a non-entity by men.
Rising from the damp grass at the edge of the lake she ignored the chill in her jeans and strode with increasing purpose across the Castle estate to find him.

Click on the image above to see what other Friday Writer's have written!

8 comments:

  1. Fabulous, Kerrin! Drew me in - and I LOVE the way SHE takes action at the end of this piece. One of my biggest pet peeves is protagonists who walk into a room and stew internally while everyone around them is talking or otherwise being active. I want an MC who can walk & chew gum at the same time.

    My only BUT, is... BUT. :-) I tend to do this myself - use filler words, like but, and, then, which makes for a light, conversational style. If you do a quick pass, you should be able to spot some buts you could make go away for a smoother read. (Aah, if only I could make my butt disappear with a quick pass.)

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  2. Thanks Beverly, and yes if only it was easy to get that BUTT to quickly disappear!

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  3. Hello Kerrin.
    Welcome to Romantic Friday Writers.

    It's sad how men and women use each other as stepping stones to move up in the world.
    I like her positive attitude at the end.

    Excellent entry!

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  4. That's a great piece for the theme - so much hurt and betrayal. I really want to read more. I love her voice here, she's hopping mad and off to do something about it.

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  5. Hi Kerrin,

    Great to have you aboard the good ship RFW romancer!

    Love this piece, it has all the hallmarks of "love hurts". I'm so glad Tori is going to sock it to the perpetrator of all her pain.

    And yes, like Bev says, we can all tighten our prose and eliminate needling words, but none of us are perfect, and as the saying goes: those who live in glasshouses shouldn't throw stones!

    Have a great week. ;)
    best
    F

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  6. This is fabulous. I think Francine is going to have a tough time picking the writer of the week this time. I envision this character making sure that guy gets his dues. Hehe...

    I know Nicole too. Wonderful and generous person.
    Nancy
    N. R. Williams, The Treasures of Carmelidrium

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  7. Great ending! For a moment, I thought she was just going to wallow in misery (not unlike myself at times. Fave line: "shallow reflections of what she'd been looking for".

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  8. Hi guys, thanks for the feedback! Early on in the story Tori decides to get more spine, so here she is taking charge!

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